A TIME TO EVERY PURPOSE, by Lisa Oliver

Nell nuzzled her head against me.  I rubbed her nose. Her eyes fixed on me and I swear she knew. It was barely dawn.  Everyone but Jim was asleep.  He insisted the night watch suited him but I think he likes to watch out for us.  He says us young ones are the hope for the future but I don’t know.  We’ve lost too many. 

He came to meet me at the gates.  ‘You taking her out?’  He nodded his approval and patted her neck.  He turned the winch and the metal barricades opened.  Nell stamped her feet, anxious to get going.  It hadn’t affected the horses or the dogs.  For some reason our natural companions had been spared, and we were grateful for this small mercy. 

I rode without a mask.  I breathed in a sharp lungful of sweet air, aware of the risk as I did so.  In the freedom of the morning with a horse beneath me and an open field ahead of me, it was one I was content to take.

Jim nodded at me to go on.  I felt fear run through me.  No-one ventured out unless they had to.  Not after Simon had returned, barely alive.  

I kicked at Nell’s flank and felt the sudden jerk of movement.  We were away, kicking up clumps of damp earth, a faint mist cooling my face as she galloped on.  I saw a pack of dogs in the distance.  They looked well nourished.  There were clearly pickings to be had.  Pickings I didn’t want to dwell on.  One of them approached me, its tail up, expectant.  We needed dogs, good ones. He trotted along beside me, looking up at me every now again, panting a smile.  Today was not the day though.  When I paid him no attention, he gave up on me and ran back into the wastes. 

 I pulled on the reins, turning Nell onto the road south. It was the road Eve and I had ridden in on all those months ago.  When we’d found the settlement, they’d welcomed us.  We both knew it was because of Nell.  What use was there for a half-ruined man and his pregnant wife?  But one horse had carried the vote for both of us. 

*

The metal groaned as Jim opened the gates.  ‘It’s alright lad, I’ll take her now.’  I dismounted.  I didn’t look at Nell again.

*

Eve was in the communal room, nursing our son.  He pulled at her nipple, his fist slapping at her breast in frustration.  I sat down next to her, putting my arm around her fragile shoulders.

‘Is it done?’ she asked.  I nodded.  We would eat well tonight.  Her eyes filled with tears.  Then she looked down at our son.  ‘Good,’ she said.

copyright©Lisa Oliver

MISSING BILL, by Lisa Oliver

Hannah says sometimes the voices are loud and clear, other times she only hears whispers, hints of a presence.  Hannah hasn’t heard his voice yet, but says she’s sure Bill’s there. She says she can see a man with a thick head of white hair. Well, that’s Bill to a T.  He was always so proud of his hair, it never thinned.  And Hannah says he is very smartly dressed.  He did look lovely in a suit.  I used to be so proud of him when we went out.  He liked to treat me to Sunday lunch every week.  Even when he couldn’t drive any more he’d treat us to a taxi down to the White Lion.  He said I shouldn’t be cooking on a Sunday; it was a day of rest. Oh, I do miss him.

Hannah says he is with me still, he’s never left me.  He’s just on a different plane.  One that I can’t, now, what was the word?  Oh yes, one that I can’t ‘connect’ to.  It’s hard to understand, but she’s ever so clever. Really puts it in a way that makes sense.  She can connect you see.  She’s got a gift.  I’ve been seeing her for a while now and she says Bill’s presence is getting stronger all the time. My friend Lizzie has been going to see her for years.  She lost her daughter you see.  Hannah’s been a great comfort to her. 

I never expected Hannah would be able to help me too.  I was ever so sceptical the first time I went.  Lizzie persuaded me, she said if it wasn’t for me then at least I’d given it a try.  She knows how much I miss Bill.  Well I would, wouldn’t I after being married to him for so long.   Lizzie said I couldn’t carry on like this.  She was right too. I did feel so much better after I saw Hannah.  I felt like I had a little bit of Bill back with me.  She said he was there next to me, resting his hand on my shoulder.  I couldn’t feel anything mind, but she’s such a nice girl; she reassured me he was right there. 

Our Sandra thinks I should leave well alone.  She says it’s an expense I can’t afford.  I don’t mind though, it’s worth it.  And I don’t mind cutting back a little bit if it means, well, if it means I might hear from Bill.  I do miss him.

copyright©Lisa Oliver

SUMMER KISSES, by Lisa Oliver

It wasn't her world

it was mine

The only pebble on the beach

Her replica

running for the sea

Looking for pebbles 

but finding me

A name I'll never know

because I didn't ask

My other self

walked away

A found poem from the short story, 'The Only Pebble on the Beach' by Pauline Fisk.

Poem found by Lisa Oliver. Title taken from a piece of flash, 'Cliff' by Adrian Perks.  

Copyright©Lisa Oliver